Only Time ⏳

This week I had to travel to a small city nearby – first time – officially taking the road with myself driving, which, TRUST me, is an accomplishment.

I had several hearings, which I went to with my colleague as part of a new contract that involves lots of new things and subjects and cases. It has been SUPER exciting, but also demanding and challenging, in so many levels. However, it also led me to realize how far I’ve come.

I’ll explain. 

During the hearing, the other lawyer was evidently – pardon my language – throwing sht at the fan. He was speaking so loudly, saying all sorts of nonsense and talking over the judge. 

In the past, this agressive attitude would have intimidated me. This time, I saw through it and realized how emotionally unprepared he was.

I mean. It’s that big bad bully myth. The roar that will make the opponent back up into the corner and win by W.O. IT USED TO WORK ON ME! Now, it just doesn’t anymore and this showed me how far I’ve come through the practice of the Law.

When I started Law School, so many people told me how it was the wrong career for me – even if I grew up hearing how I annoying I was for questioning everything, therefore, I should be a lawyer hehe.

I was too sweet, too calm, not feisty enough. Basically, I would have been eaten alive. It was just not my field. “Stick to something like… psychology, architecture. Veterinary maybe, you love animals”.

And I believed it.

As much as I loved being in Law School and even as an intern doing minor things in court like, delivering a motion, getting the files from a case. Once I graduated. Once I passed the bar (1st try on one of the hardest editions of the history of the national exam)… I froze. Somehow, all that I’ve heard penetrated my mind and I just… bought that idea that… I didn’t have what it takes.

It’s really funny because. Passing the bar isn’t easy. And I told myself. If I don’t. I’ll give it up. So many times, I tried to find the way out. I was so scared, I was always looking for the next exit.

I tried changing jobs. I tried maybe… not practice it and doing something else, like a public job. Turned into coaching classes and studies. Maybe this would be it!

But nothing felt right.

Every new job, I would question myself. Do I got this? Do I have what it takes? And I would just give my blood, sweat and tears because… in my mind, I was so wrong for all of this that I needed to compensate by being the best at it. The best writing, the best research, the best knowledge of the situation, the most hours worked.

So, at some point, fed up with this torture… I just decided to embrace it. I said to myself: “Ok. I’ll give this my all. My whole heart and soul. And if it doesn’t work, then I’ll know I’m not right for it and then I’ll give up“.

And I kept going. I’ve looked to the people I worked with and learned to appreciate who they were, how they worked. Every new motion, as complicated as it looked I just told myself: “if this is in my hands now, if this found me. Then, I’ve got everything I need to deal with this”. And, in this process, through all the tribulations, by sticking up to it every time I just wanted to run away and cry – WHICH I DID BTW. At my first seminar in college. I became so much stronger.

Yes, it’s scary. And yes, who I was when I entered law school wasn’t AT ALL ready to tackle being an attorney. But… who said we were born ready?!

I was always a perfectionist and that made me demand of myself the impossible. Which made me miserable and anxious. Once I just accepted where the “imperfection” of who I was. Once, I said… let’s take it from here… everything changed and I slowly became who I am today (so proud of it!)

Today, looking at the attorney I’ve became. A little bit of a troublemaker, to be honest. No one would’ve ever say that mellow girl hid such a fierce, passionate lawyer. And isn’t that amazing?!

We can’t be something we’re not. Yet. We are always becoming. Even if somehow we always hold the latent potential of being everything that we are… it is the experience and the living through it that will give us the insight and the clues we need to get to the next step.

Face the obstacles. Rise to the challenge. You may not be the one who will tackle it when you first encounter it, but by going through it you will get everything you need to overcome it and become who you need to be.

And isn’t that magical? All you have to do is take one step at a time and be the best you can at that moment. Everything else takes care of itself.

Now, no roar loud enough to take down the court house will scare me into the corner. There’s nothing to fear inside of me, so there’s nothing on the outside that can cage me. And that is just… BEAUTIFUL! ❤

Every Man is an Universe

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As we grow and learn to be part of the community, its rules begin to sink in us. Certainly, they’re extremely important to allow things to function properly. However, even they have jurisdiction limitations: individuality.

Individuality is the gathering of all qualities that make something or someone unique, original. And that we are: stories, memories, dreams. There are so many nuances that, sometimes, being so hard knowing thyself (and we are never separate, not even for one second). I wonder how someone could ever claim knowing the other. And more: judging to know what is right or wrong for them.

Each person is a world in itself. Each one is the result of all of their experiences, their perception of happenings. All with an unique baggage, such as their fingerprints. So, how can we expect others to think, dress, behave just as we do? Why impose our conclusions and rules to others? Telling them when or not it is appropriate to feel something? Why cross their borders without permission? We can’t!

The well-being and happiness that we seek is never outside of us. The changing of behavior of other is not the answer. We need to look in, not out. As the way we deal the outside world is a reflection of how we live in our inner world. So, everything begins with us, tidying up our own house. And, just as sometimes we struggle, the other struggle as well.

We’re living in a time and space where everyting happens so fast. It is harder and harder to disguise who we really are. And that’s a blessing, for we must deal with our own limitations, engage in improving ourselves and it can only lead us to growing!

It is vital that we know our limits and boundaries, knowing how to defend ourselves when our borders are crossed. And just as we wish respect and comprehension to learn and explore ourselves peacefully, so we must offer to others.

“Man is a universe within himself” and if, when visiting other countries, we prepare and respect their mores and culture. More importantly then wouldn’t do that for our fellows human beings? Starts with you. 

Self-imposed Limitations

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Living among others is precious. Through that, we have the opportunity of exercising our personalities, develop our capacity of loving and understanding. We become able to see beyond our own experience and perception. We discover who we are. We learn. We conquer. And this is because we’re all differents. And everyone brings to the table an unmatchable set of skils and an unique contribution.

Two people will hardly perceive something exactly the same way. It may look like that, but the nuances are so personal! And this is why we have the right, the freedom… better yet: the obligation of being who we are, because there is no one like us. 

 

One cannot tell the other what he is capable of doing or not. Usually, when giving his opinion, one will only consider his own perception and experience, ignoring that the other is a world in himself. 

When looking to others experiences, we may think that their limitations are also ours. However, what truly limits us are only our beliefs. That is why it is so important to scan the world and adapt what we find out to our necessities, respecting our individuality. 

The habit of searching, reflecting and understanding our own experiences and being aware to the beliefs that may be keeping us from a happy and peaceful life is key to building a full life that is just right for us. 

We don’t all have to do the same things, live the same way. Just because someone became successful does not mean that you will have to do the same thing in order to be successful too. Of course, we can always make use of what is already know, but we can never forget that we cannot force ourselves into a box that is not ours. We have to walk our own way. 

The world is full of opportunities. There’s space for the millions of possibilities that we humans are. In each moment, we’re making choices, changing our ways, building our future. And it is not limited by our past, our mistakes, our pain. It is unlimited, infinite… just like us. 

We’re capable of extraordinary things and the first step is believing in ourselves. Never give up! Keep walking. 

 

We’re eternal, we’re infinite…

It is always time for change. Every  day we have the opportunity to imprint a new direction to our existence. Everything is changing all the time. A moment is eternity.  Eternity is a moment.

No matter how long something has been going on. In a heartbeat, everything can transform. Ourselves, a situation, a habit. It is always time for a breakthrough. It is never too late do iniciate something new, to reignite a flame. No matter how old you are, your background.

We’re constantly building ourselves. Moment by moment. We’re not a finished work, put into this world like a done deal. We do not die as we were born. We go through so much in between.

Our past does not determine our present, nor our future. Every day, every moment, we are given a blank slate and we can write whatever we want.

We’re an ongoing project. A painting in progress. But this project will never be done. This painting will never be finished. We’re never going to be really ready, done, finished, because… we’re eternal. And, as long as there is life, there will be movement. Not even death can end that.

 

Us and the World

What if the world was a result of everything we ever wished for? What if you had the power to transform the world into the place of your dreams? What it would be like? Exactly as it is today? Probably not.

However, the reality is the product of our thoughts and actions. So, what does the world we live in today say about us?

It is always very hard to look at ourselves and find out what in us need improvement. It is always so much easier to look to the other and blame it all on them. But, the funny thing is: what bothers us in others is, usually, a reflection of ourselves. It’s easier to see in others what we don’t see in ourselves. And maybe, this is the big purpose and beauty of relationships.

It is through relationships – not only with people, but animals, plants, places… everything there is – that we create ourselves and build the world.

This is way, everything there is today is a result of how we relate to everything around us. We influence and are influenced by others ALL the time!

And in this scenery, the job of a leader is EXTREMELY important. And who would that be? Someone who is not attached by the rules, by how things has always been, but is capable of creating its own reality, through his beliefs, intuition, faith and certainty in this capacity of doing. So, the truth is, we’re all potential leaders, as long as we always try our best and believe in it, living up to our potential. We are, therefore, so capable of changing the world.

So… let’s say… today, instead of going in to work and give yourself up to discouragement or distracting yourself with social medias, avoiding your own reality, you thanked for that opportunity of being in that place with those people, learning whatever it is that you need to grow and develop? And… what if, instead of being upset with your partner, you decided to understand him? Or, if you stopped waiting for someone else to give what you’re missing, but gave a little bit more of yourself to others? Wouldn’t small things like that change the world into a place of opportunities to all of us!?

Nothing is by change! There is a reason why everything is as it is. And that would by our own limits that need to be overcome. The world is not a place of problems, but a place of OPPORTUNITIES. And how you will seize them is what is going to define who you are.