When I first started looking into Coaching, the first person I read/watched was Tony Robbins. You could register for one call with one of his Coaches and so, I did.
We were talking about so many things and I brought up being kinda of a perfectionist. Not a hardcore one. A chill perfectionist. And he asked me the complete the following sentence: “sometimes you win, sometimes…”
“You lose!”
I screamed to my Skype.
And then the said:
“No, you learn!”
That was a concept that stuck with me. However, at that time, I didn’t notice or valued it at all. I was like: “OK, LOSER!”.
It was such a foreigner concept to an overachiever such as myself.
What I know today is… by not being willing to “make a mistake” or “being wrong”, I was actually limiting myself so much. Not only I was not creating the life I wanted, my need to get it right every time took such a toll on me. I was constantly questioning myself, which gave me little self-esteem habits and huge amounts of anxiety. Which I know now is always a sympton of something that require change.
Even if my sense of “not being good enough” or “always being able to do better” was such gift, because it pushed me to be greater and greater. What I know now is that…
It can be easier!
With that knowledge, it’s easy to see how perfectionist is just a way of stopping ourselves. It’s a way of postponing, procrastinating or simply running from ourselves. And there’s this quote that comes to me often – that my friend read it on one of her amazing zoom meetings:
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
Marianne Williamson
Not just in ourselves, but also in the Universe. The universe ALWAYS has our backs and it’s our lack of trust in ourselves that doesn’t allow it to show up fully. It’s like they say: you can only receive from others as much as you can receive from yourself.
Instead of looking outside for validation of always getting everything right or doing everything perfectly, what would it be like to have it as a bonus of knowing you are worthy no matter what?
How much more fun and easy would life be from the knowing that… you can never lose, because everything is information that you can use from that point forward to create more?
I love a quote from Abraham-Hicks:
That was then. This is now!
A reminder that you’re not bound to your past. Or, as Access Consciousness will teach: nothing really. Not even – or specially – your own points of view.
What would it look like to trust you fully? And to surrender yourself to life, without fears, allowing all of you to truly show up? How much is the universe waiting to gift you?
As Sarah Grandinetti shared this weekend on her Your First Date With The Future “non-class”, what it takes is not this huge target or huge change. It’s just the next step. Stepping out of the bubble.
So what would it take to have just a little more trust in ourselves today? Of releasing that project into the world? “Imperfect” as it is. It’s never done. It will never be…. and that’s the fun of it!
Paula Camila Pinto 